Dear Jesus thank you for this gift we just received. Chad Ochocinco has thrown his beautiful naked body with a football strategically placed over his junk, behind PETA’s Ink, Not Mink campaign.

Chad Ochocinco Confirms His Engagement

An avid animal lover his entire life, even as a child he couldn’t fathom people wearing fur for coats:

“To tell you the truth, when I was younger growing up, I thought it was all fake―they didn’t really kill animals.”

I think I’m actually speechless.  I really have no more to write about this.  What else could I possibly say? I do have something more to say.  After staring at this lovely photo for a very long time it occurred to me: he manscapes!! Who doesn’t love that?