That’s right, all of them! The cast of The Expendables 2 have all been crammed onto this poster and they looked lean, mean and ready to eat glass or f**k you up. They’re back baby, the Godfathers of Action are back in action(now, don’t be mean and call them the Grandfathers. The Stath would have something to say about that I’m sure). Led once again by Sylvester Stallone as Barney Ross, Jason Statham as Lee Christmas, anyone who didn’t die in the first one is back for round two. The cameos by Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger (who’s really hoping this will make you forget he’s a classless scumbag) have, this go-round, been expanded into costarring roles.

They’re joined by Chuck Norris, whose invitation to the last gig must have gotten lost in the mail, or he was on his Total Gym and couldn’t get up to answer the phone. How the hell did Jean Claude Van Damme miss out on the opportunity to do some ‘van-damage’ (sorry, I had to) last time out? We’ve also got an Expendable female, relative unknown, Nan Yu. She looks ready to throw down. Liam Hemsworth, fresh from the Hunger Games joins the party, but he’s not on the poster. I hope that doesn’t mean he plays someone’s (Stallone’s) kid or something clichéd like that. Coulda been worse, coulda been Taylor Lautner.

The plot, which was apparently devised before the first one was even released, is currently under a veil of secrecy, but seriously, does it even matter? If you buy a ticket to this and expect exposition, character development and a cohesive storyline, you’re in the wrong theater. The first one was great fun, but I’ll be van-damned if I can tell you what it was about.

The Expendables 2 blasts its way into theaters all over the world on August 17

Christopher, Patrick and Katherine Schwarzenegger Los Angeles Premiere of 'Terminator Salvation'

Christopher Schwarzenegger is home safely now after about a week in the hospital following his surfing accident.  He suffered a collapsed lung and broken ribs.

He is the 13-year-old son of Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver who have been going through a very messy, public divorce.

Maria Tweeted the happy news,

“Blessed to be able to take Christopher out of the hospital last night. What a feeling of relief to know that he’s going to be fine.”

Then Arnie added,

 ”I knew Christopher couldn’t be stopped! Big thanks to all the doctors, nurses & staff at UCLA that helped him recover.”

So glad he’s okay!  Get well soon Christopher!

Photo: WENN

Puke alert. Please don’t send death threats for posting this video, but some things have to be seen to be believed. Arnold Schwarzenegger’s ‘alleged’ mistress and baby mama, Mildred Baena can be seen here in this video singing Happy Birthday a la Marilyn Monroe style.

ET Online is reporting that the video, taken several years ago, was done on the exact same day that Baena attended a quinceanera celebration for Baena’s niece. That particular party was attended by Maria Shriver and Arnold Schwarzenegger. This assault on the eyes was not attended by Schwarzenegger and Shriver.

Normally I do not like to put people down for their looks because beauty is in the eye of the beholder and who is considered attractive is a very subjective thing. HOWEVER are you effing kidding me? There is NOTHING sexy about this woman or attractive. And the fact that she was a ‘social climber’ only makes her MORE unattractive if that was even possible.

I love the part in the video when some girl comes up on stage and practically pries the mic out of Barfena’s hands. I hope y’all weren’t eating and threw your food up.

If I could say anything to Maria Shriver it would be don’t look back. Clearly Schwarzenegger was a dog and that had nothing to do with Shriver. I mean really, just look at this video.

And we all know that she should have dumped his sick ass years ago… perhaps about 14 or 15?  Maria Shriver is clearly over Arnold Schwarzenegger and she’s ready to get this marriage legally terminated.  Bahahaha! With all of the humiliation that she’s going through thanks to Arnie sleeping with the fugly maid, I am surprised that Maria is keeping it together so well.

Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Movie Career Not Coming Back, Yet

Sources are reporting that Maria will have all the legal papers filed within the next couple of days.  If the judge was kind enough to have any mercy, they’d grant an immediate divorce and not make them wait the usual six month period.  Maria deserves to be rid of him NOW…..

Photo: WENN

Arnold Schwarzenegger seems to have a pretty full plate at the moment with all of his extramarital issues coming to a head in the media.  You know, sleeping with the maid and having a “love child” that surfaces 13 years later… that can take away from the whole Hollywood career thing.

Arnold Schwarzenegger Has A SECOND Love Child?

Arnold announced he’s putting his acting career on hold until he can get his personal life in order.  His office released the statement for him of course:

“At the request of Arnold Schwarzenegger, we asked Creative Artists Agency to inform all his motion picture projects currently underway or being negotiated to stop planning until further notice,” Patrick Knapp, entertainment counsel to Schwarzenegger, said in a statement. “Gov. Schwarzenegger is focusing on personal matters and is not willing to commit to any production schedules or timelines. This includes ‘Cry Macho,’ ‘The Terminator’ franchise and other projects under consideration. We will resume discussions when Gov. Schwarzenegger decides.”

I don’t know of any Arnold fans at this point anyhow, so he’s better off finding a deep hole and hiding in it for a long, long time.

Photo: WENN

Actually make that a first Arnold Schwarzenegger love child, as today’s outing of the existence of a child he had with a household staff member is allegedly the second love child.

The first love child apparently was written about in 2003 in The Daily Mail. Interestingly enough that article no longer exists.  I will not divulge the child’s name out of respect for his privacy, but given that I am linking to the article that does name him big deal, right? He may be an adult now, but he shouldn’t have to suffer because Arnie couldn’t keep it in his pants.

The woman he had the child with is Tammy Tousignant. The author of the original Daily Mail article, Schwarzenegger biographer Wendy Leigh revealed to Gawker:

“I’m hearing that this is a different child,” she says. “Which means there are two.”

And she’s quite adamant about her revelation back in 2003. The mother of the child was a stewardess on Schwarzenegger’s private plane and was in her late 20’s at the time she met the Sperminator.

And if you think this will come as a surprise to Maria Shriver, think again. The article goes on to say that Shriver had the woman sacked and that everyone, and they mean EVERYONE, knew this woman was his mistress at the time.

I’m going to go get a DNA test just to make sure I’m not Ahhhnie’s daughter. I recommend you should too. Ha! I just told my husband what I was going to do and he is actually hoping I am Ahhhnie’s daughter. Ca-ching.

Photo: Gawker